I am writing a women’s fiction story of my great-grandmother based on her life. While I am having fun imagining scenes to fill in where there is no documentation, history must be written correctly. My paternal great-grandmother, Ollie Francis Johnson Utter Brier, married at age 14 to Dee Jay Utter, who was 23. When my brother read the first few chapters of my manuscripit, we discussed the issue of why would an early teen girl marry an older man? In today's world it is not as common for that to happen. That is the reason for the question I posed about why girls married at such young ages years ago. Of course, we must look at the era in which they married, 1909, Missouri. It's been fun listening to everyone who wanted to share a story or historical facts with me. To all who did, I thank you!
Disclaimer: This list is not all-inclusive. There are many reasons why girls married at a young age that may not be listed. Even if one of our ancestors married young for a reason that is listed here, each person has a unique set of circumstances that shapes the reasons they do something and the choices that they make. With that in mind, a list such as this may never contain every reason a female married young.
ANCESTORS MARRYING AT A YOUNG AGE
By Karen Utter Jennings
Why did our female ancestors get married at a young age? Social & Economical reasons played a huge role in our ancestor’s lives. Prior to WWI, girls commonly married by the age of 14-16 & they sometimes married men 5-10 years older. As WWII began, many Americans rushed to get married. They also decided to have children as soon as possible. During that time, marriage and birth rates soared.
Here are a few of the reasons I gathered:
City:
In the city, females usually were older when they married. By the end of the 19th century, girls who could afford it were getting an education, going through a full high school, a teacher "normal" school, or even college. Rich girls were going on grand tours of Europe and attending finishing schools there. Girls from poor families might have worked and saved money for a sort of dowry.
Country:
In the rural & farming communities, men needed Men needed to marry and have children, especially boys, to work the land. It was the only way to get ahead if they wanted to make the land profitable.
Economic:
The historical lack of ways for women to work and earn wages led to only two options: further their education or get married. Depending on the era, occupations for women were limited.
Gender & Expectations:
Males were favored over females; it was thought female children had less value. Marrying off a girl was a way for a father to feed the remaining kids at home. Boys could help work the land, which meant they sometimes stayed at home longer. It was a man’s world and women had no rights, even to their own bodies and their children. Females were expected to marry and keep house & raise the children.
Geographical locations & the Era:
The areas in which a person lived set the tone for social mores and values for the marriageable age. From the New England states, to the West Coast, to the prairies, the northern & southern states, to the Wild West, family beliefs differed significantly. It was also affected by the era in which they lived. For example, Victorian America held different views of marriage than the Roaring Twenties. From the book, “Marriage in the Victorian Era” by Jen Ziegenfuss, she states that marriage was not romanticized or fairytale-like as depicted in some books. Love played a minor role in marriages. Rather, they were looked upon more as a business-like deal. There were strict “rules” & etiquette to follow. After marriage, as in other eras, women belonged to their husband & owned nothing.
Childbirth:
High infant mortality and women dying in childbirth was common, so the idea was to marry young to give a woman more childbearing years. This actually contributed to the high death toll because young girls were not fully developed.
Land:
Owning land was and always will be the lifeblood of families. It gave families social and economic status. Many movies and books abound using land as the reason for feuds, murders, illicit marriages, and all kinds of immoral purposes.
Life expectancy:
Life expectancy wasn’t anywhere near what it is today. In different eras, life expectancy fluctuates. Due to the hardships of life, many children and adults died early. So many people married and started a family as soon as they could.
Love:
Sometimes love was the simple reason for couples getting married. On the other hand, a girl might be looking for someone to love her.
Money:
Sometimes marriages revolved around money. One or the other needs it and the other one has it, so through some scheme marriage people marry.
Debatable purposes:
Sometimes couples married because there was a baby on the way. Also through blackmail, abduction, and other disreputable schemes, marriages were used for evil purposes.
Parents:
Sometimes the parents thought it was a good idea for their young child to marry for whatever reasons so they would arrange for their child to marry another child whom they approved.
Safety: Generally, a young woman was safer from unscrupulous men if she were married. She was also 'safe' from an unplanned pregnancy with a suitor if they married before their relationship turned sexual. If the girl was in an abusive home life, she might get married to escape the abuse.
Security: sometimes girls needed a guardian and marriage was the safest way for her to have one. Families were quick to marry their daughters off thinking their daughters would be taken care of. If she was an orphan, she might marry for security purposes.
Social Interaction:
This was an important part of life, no matter the gender. Interacting with peers helped women grow, bond, share, learn and think for themselves. Women have formed groups centered around the community, school, and church for years.
Widowers & Widows:
A widower would remarry quickly after their wife died because they needed someone to care for the children of the previous marriage. A widower looked for a young, unmarried, & hearty woman to have children, again, and to cook and clean the house. A much younger woman might marry an older man, 10, 20, or 30 years older.
Sources used to write this article were taken from several authors’ comments from the 19th Century Writers online group; “Women Making America” by Heidi Hemming & Julie Hemming Savage; family & friends from Face Book; “Marriage in the Victorian Era” by Jen Ziegenfuss; “Marriages & Families” Second Edition, by Constance L. Shehan; and other online sources.
